1 hour : 22 minutes : 57 seconds

She never thought this day could get any worse, the sad emotional, fool that she was. As they slept in each others arms she wondered to herself, "How did I get this lucky?" She smiled to herself, and made a mental note, 'Don't let him catch you smile. EVER.'
He didn't understand why women were so affectionate, all the time. He just put women in the same bracket as all things pink, and teddy bears, and body lotions that smell like fruit. He never told her, how much he loved how nice she would smell every single day. He knew she was different. Good different. As they kissed, she realized how much it hurt to know that she liked him so much more than he liked her. But she told herself everyday, that it was okay. Two people are never identical.
He knew she was having a rough day and he tried to make her laugh, he tickled her, messed her hair up, he even propped her nose up to make her look like a pig. He didn't know any better. And she didn't know anything at all. She wondered if speaking about the day with a man who would much rather not listen, would do any good? He delayed leaving her, because he knew she was hurting, but he always was good at letting guilt go. Quick. Dirty. Painless. The minute he left, she cried, after so long. Loud. Long. Painful.
When he called her later, just as he promised he would, she felt lost, and distracted. She could hear a certain dejection in his voice. She could almost hear him say, "I can't believe I chose this for myself." She asked him why he sounded like he was out of hope, like he was unhappy. He just said, he wasn't. In fact, he was affirmative in his response. He actually said the words, "I am happy." But she, the cynic that she was, didn't believe a word. How could she believe him, when every chance he got, he left her stranded and questioned her feelings? He told her, that she had the tendency to behave like she was the only one with problems. So much for her belief and pride in her strength and ability to overcome tough situations by herself. She thought, you spend all your life wondering if the few things that you like about yourself are actually worth appreciating, and you hope, like all fools do, that the one person you share most of your life's moments with isn't the same person who succeeds in making you believe that those things don't really exist at all.
She always hated men who didn't respond when she spoke. And he was as she always said, 'another level of heartless.' But she remembered, a little later in the day, but she remembered, that, 'he was not so good with words, but oh so good with heart.' Another thing she always said about him. She told him how she needed him, and that he should never stop being himself because that is what she liked the most about him. Every inch of his body, every small part of his heart. She told him that she had forgotten that although he didn't listen, because she never spoke, he did blow wind on her face, and kissed her cheeks, and bit her arm, and held her tightly, and that was the best he could do, and his best was good enough. He didn't pay any heed to her words then, for he had crossed over to a land where he was a man's man, where he said hurtful things, and she was sarcastic, even when she was crying. She asked him, "Do you really like this? Us?" To which he said, "Yes.", and then she asked, "Tell me please what it is you like about us?" and he curtly replied, "No."
Some more hurtful words and then came the line that drove her sleep away. "I will talk to you tomorrow, I am too sleepy and I really don't want to understand anymore." She sighed, and in her head she imagined jumping through hoops of fire. "Goodnight" she said, saddened by the thought that this is it for tonight, or maybe...and he still didn't say a word. She waited, and shut her eyes in despair, feeling the lack of clarity, the blur, from all the tears. Hoops. Hoops. More Hoops. "The end", she said, as she hung up, and walked over to her pack of cigarettes. One drag. Two drags.Three and Four. The phone began to ring. The picture of the two of them that came up when he called, inebriated, happy, affectionate always made her smile. She remembered her mental note before she answered his call. 'Don't let him catch you smile. EVER.'
He called to say goodbye and goodnight.
Hoops. Good with heart. Painful. Painless.
1 hour: 22 minutes: 57 seconds